Life with Her
by fangirl371
Summary: This a story that coordinates with I Felt Hope. This is made up of short stories that fill in the gap years before Alice and Jasper met the Cullens. Please read and review. Won't make sense if you haven't read I Felt Hope.
1. Prolouge

**A/N This is a piece that goes with another story I wrote, **_**I Felt Hope**_**, which is the story of Alice and Jasper from Jasper's POV. If you haven't read it and are reading this, go find the other story if you want something with a real plot. I promise you guys that read **_**I Felt Hope**_** that I will update soon, but I lost my notebook where I started the next chapter. I am obsessive compulsive about staying with what I already started to write. I am pretty sure I know exactly where I left it, so you will get the next chapter soon. But I feel bad about not posting anything, so I am starting this short story that is a collection of what happened in between those years before Alice and Jasper met the Cullens. It picks up sometime after Jasper and Alice get rid of the newborn. Each chapter is a short story and they are in no particular order and don't really go together. I don't know how long this will turn out but if anyone really likes it I will continue. So please read and review…**

**Prologue **

**Jasper POV**

Watching the flashing sunlight bounce off her glimmering pale skin and on top her spiky, black curls she gracefully flounced to my side and gave me a slight peck on the cheek. Her touch brought life to my cold, unbeating heart. I gazed down at her longingly as my secure arms wrapped possessively around her waist and pulling her into me. She knew my intention as she stepped onto her tip toes to reach my lips. I bent my head to assure our lips made contact.

Kissing her could only be described as free falling in a exhilarating plunge that could only be broken with a soft landing in satisfied emotions welling from both of us as we held each other close, and murmured words of affection. I wondered how I had survived without her. Then I realized that I almost didn't. I almost killed myself before she met me. She had saved my emotional overload by telling me I didn't have to kill humans for food. She saved me from physical pain that came with too many high-wired emotions that humans emitted in death. And she saved me from a slow and agonizing mental break down due to lack of someone to be there. Someone who loved and cared about me. Alice was my savior and I never wanted to leave her.


	2. Fail

I was so thirsty. My eyes were black as coal without their normal hue of deep gold. My throat burned angrily and enflamed. This was almost unbearable. Very close to unbearable. Too close. I held my breath cautiously and clenched my fist as the delicious smelling human sauntered by. Unknowing that his life was in complete danger at the present moment.

Alice soothingly rubbed my shoulder, causing me relax, but only slightly.

"Let's hunt, Jasper. I don't know why you are trying to push yourself. You've been doing great, but there's no need to put you in any pain." I nodded reluctantly. I had been trying to see how much I could stand. How tolerant I could be of humans in my thirsty state.

But as always, Alice was completely right. I was a ticking time bomb, ready to attack any human that had even the slightest of blood seeping through their paper thin skin. I was very dangerous, even more so right now. As I stood up, my head felt light. Alice nodded at me sympathetically. She took my hand with her petite one and we started towards the city limit. The night was quiet and calm compared to the wreaking chaos in my fight for self control of my thirst. Once we were out of human sight we ran through the night towards the encroaching forest. I was grateful for the lack of humans to tempt me out here.

Once we were completely immersed in the forest, Alice and I stopped. Alice didn't even need to smell for her hunt. Instead she looked into the near future to see where her kill would be.

"Cheater…" I muttered teasingly, before closing my eyes to listen for any near animals. Alice giggled quietly before taking off into the night. Her pattering footsteps sounded off. I listened. My keen ears heard the deep, labored breathing of a large animal. I took off in that general direction. Soon my nose caught a whiff of the creature's blood. My nose involuntarily wrinkled. Animal blood was a good substitute, but it tasted nothing like the real thing. This smelled particularly revolting. Stupid herbivore.

I knew it wasn't wise to be so picky in my particular state but I listened again to see if there was anything more appetizing near by. Suddenly a new and luscious smell took over my mind.

It clouded my reason and overtook all will power I possessed. The smell made my mouth fill with venom. My instincts took hold as my uncontrollable legs pumped to find this succulent smell. The fresh flowing smell of human blood.

I wish to say that in some small part of my brain I was still sane. That I knew I didn't want this human's blood as bad as it seemed. That it would only hurt me to kill her. Her emotions would drown out everything good in my head and her grief would soon be my own. But I couldn't say that and be honest. There was only one thing on my mind at the time. I was thirsty. The human was here. They were no sooner dead.

My hands grabbed her shoulders and my sharp teeth easily broke through her thing membrane of skin around her neck. She screamed bloody murder as the blood was slowly drained from her body. Soon she became motionless and cold. Her body was limp as it feel from my grap. She wa dressed with hiking boots and a backpack. But that didn't matter. None of it really mattered.

"No!" I heard a far out cry and running feet. I felt the seeping emotions of the dead girl at my feet. Complete shock. Sudden fear. Unquestionable terror. And complete lingering angst as her life was over and my pain begun. My stomach had a knot in it and my head was spinning. My thirst had been saturated, but my throat still burned as her innocent blood tainted my record. This was the first time I had been broken. My hands started to tremble violently.

Two small arms wrapped around my waist comfortingly and held me close. I wrapped my shaking arms around her and held her tightly.

"I'm so sorry," she whispered pulling back to see my face, "This is all my fault. I should have told you. I didn't see it coming. She changed directions so quickly. I wasn't fast enough. Are you mad at me?"

I shook my head. "Of course not Alice." My voice was broken. Poor Alice looked horrible. Her eyes wide with apology and horrified at herself. She looked wounded like she had just let me down. She averted her eyes and rested her chin on my shoulder. I gently stroked her hair, trying to get rid of the lingering shroud of anguish that clouded my mind and gave me overwhelming grief that was never mine to begin with.

But what was worse was that I had let Alice down. She had given me another way and I had failed. Why was I so uncontrollable? So violent? Why did this always have to be a natural part of my life? I was about to voice my questions, when Alice stopped me.

"No Jasper, don't you dare put this on yourself. I should have seen this. It's not your fault, so stop beating yourself up about it." She said glaring at me with her small hands set on her hips. She snapped me out of my daze. The concern that was coming off her was touching. I suddenly knew that she was going to try to blame herself.

"How about," I compromised, "I won't blame myself if you don't blame yourself either?" She studied my expression carefully.

"Fine," she sighed. She then hugged me around my waist.

"But I'm still sorry. I know that you are still upset because of what you did. But it will get better, I promise."

**So… could you review if you liked it? Please and thank you :) **


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